As soon as a young man begins the ritual of dating females, he becomes susceptible to a dark and evil ability that all women are born with: The Look.
Women usually give their significant others ‘the look’ when the man has done something wrong or said some flippant offhanded remark. With that said, men everywhere who have been in a stable relationship with a female for more than three weeks can be affected by this blood freezing ability.
Usually the look only affects the actual man that the female is involved with, but I know from first hand experience that men who are friends of the man getting the look can sometimes be affected as well, typically to a much lesser degree.
Women Wiki does not have any mention of this dangerous ability all women have. Yep, I looked.
The Look – An Ability All Women Have
Sadly, I have also seen male pets and male nonpets affected by the look.
In fact one time, while at my parent’s lake house several years ago, there was a squirrel outside the sliding glass door on the deck. He was just minding his own business doing what squirrels do when the bird feeder has been filled with black sunflower seeds. I got the look while I was inside the house but standing in front of the glass door.
Of course when I got the look I immediately cringed and turned away to lessen the devastating affect. While doing so I glanced out the glass door and saw the poor squirrel pass out. He just flopped over on his side and laid there for almost five minutes!
When the squirrel finally got up and walked away he did so with a severe limp. Usually when a homo-sapien man absorbs the full assault of the look the various physical and emotional affects will last anywhere from several seconds to three minutes. But that poor squirrel couldn’t weigh more than a couple pounds, so he was lucky he didn’t just disintegrate.
Men Never Learn How To Actually Avoid The Look
Anyway, earlier today I got the look yet again. You would think I would learn to keep my mouth shut, but no…I’m stupid. Of course it was my own fault that I brought this doom upon myself, but because I’m a man I never know any better at the time. Hindsight is a harsh mistress.
The conversation between myself and Nancy was routine for the most part, but soon turned to the subject of house chores. I don’t remember exactly what I said, but I’m sure it was something about she being the woman of the house and “such and such chores are for the woman to do”.
At the time I said that unwise remark I was walking away towards another room and about to enter the hallway that would take me out of Nancy’s sight. I made a rookie mistake of looking over my shoulder at her when I was hit with the look.
Luckily, as I mentioned just a moment before, I was heading into the hallway and my forward momentum carried me out of Nancy’s blistering sight just before the full paralyzing affect of the look could be bored into my soul with her laser beam eyes. I was very lucky, as the duration of her ‘look’ only affected one of my testicles with a numbing feeling that went away after thirty seconds.
Live To Learn With The Look? Good Luck With That!
Live and learn, guys… live and learn. Don’t let your inner voice say things aloud, even if you’re just joking like I had been. I of course apologized later and thanked her for not using all of her ‘look powers’ (pretty sure she held back a little) and was given permission to go North this coming weekend to enjoy the Great Outdoors. Perhaps I will go fishing or for a hike. Maybe both.
TD
P.s. Ever wonder what Deer Camp is all about? Here’s another fun one to read: What Is Deer Camp About!?
Hey TD:
Hee! This made me l-a-u-g-h!
It did strike me as an unfair advantage that us women have over you guys.
I have found, however, that there are some guys who’ve developed a kind of teflon armor that deflects that Look. Others know how to tap-dance their way out of range (or duck). Frustrating!
I personally think it’s a mom-thing. (Even if the female in question is not a mom, she probably had some kind of a model in her life from whom she could copy the Look.)
I’m glad the Look works, actually. It keeps you barbarian-types more civilized, I say.
HI Netta!
Thanks for reading and the comment. I suppose a fella might be able to build up a resistance to the Look… I however am nowhere close to having such an ability. I sometimes know when I might do something to get the Look, then I will do all I can to avoid eye contact, but usually that’s not how things go down Usually, because I am a ding-dong, I say and do things without realizing it will warrant the Look, and then I get blasted by it.
TD
Those are very good examples of “the look” in your photos. I have received that look, too, and it has been from almost every female I have spent any time with. Unfortunately “the look” can be so aversive that escape is the best answer. You talk about enjoying the outdoors for that. Do you ever take the ‘lookers” along with you? If so, maybe that will soften them a bit.
Thanks for reading and the comment –
As for bringing the wife along on my outdoor activities… yes, sometimes she does go along. Usually not, however. She does like to car camp once or twice a year, but that is usually the limit. We have a nice off grid lodge/cabin that she doesn’t even like going to that has solar powered running water (shower, toilet, kitchen sink…etc…).
TD
LOL, I have been married now for nearly 18 years and have had my experiences with The Look far too often. She is from a family with a different religion, is just starting to understand non-indoctrinated politics, and is less old-fashioned than this fool. I have been everything from the before mentioned in your post sexist comment to offending her Jehova’s Witness beliefs and being Anti Union in a pro-union family. I personally believe workers don’t need to pay someone millions to speak and think for them including tell them how to vote and her dad was a pure union man so he told her only good things about them. Here comes the look again as she reads this over my shoulder.
Run Andy Run!
Wow… I can only imagine how many times you have been blasted with the ‘look’ in your family. It sure sounds like you have many differences on some issues that are ripe with strife in this day and age we live in.
You sir… I’ll be worrying for you.
Best of luck! I mean it!!!
TD
Hi TD,
As I am writing this comment I am getting that look from my other half, the look of why don’t you help me instead of doing stuff on the laptop.
The look I believe is mostly a built in response from people who rather than say something will use gestures to put their point across in order to avoid a confrontation. What do you think? and don’t you believe that it’s not only women but men also give the look but for different reasons.
Khayyam
Hi,
Yes, I think you are correct. Most people have a ‘look’. No doubt about it… But women in particular have that ability like no others.
Best of luck!
TD
I like how you bring these type of subjects up. Manly and womanly type of discussions discussions that we don’t usually have so I appreciate how you use this info to get us all motivated to avoid the look. Great posted for today. Will look for it of course the
Hi Andrew – Thanks for reading and the message. I do plan on perhaps posting a few more similarly themed articles on the ever going battle men and women face between each other; household dominance!
TD
Fantastic article this is definitely a must read for all men. We as men don’t seem to know when to put the brakes on our mouth and Bam it’s to late.
I have been crippled many times by the look and If you think about it truly starts with our mothers as a child and the oh boy I just screwed up.
I truly enjoyed your story It had me laughing knowing yup that’s what happens.
Again thank you for this great read,
David
Hi David
You, Sir, are correct. It starts with our mothers and us as a child. Sure, females learn to develop this dangerous ability at an early age, but boys also learn to fear it and cringe at an early age when mothers levy that ‘look’ at us.
Thanks for reading!
TD
Hey TD,
I’ve never of this thing before, is it a real thing? Do women has the powers called “the look”? I’m a single guy so I guess I might not know, but I have experience some serious “look” from my mom when I was growing up. Anytime my family and I go to church and misbehave our moms will turn and give us a look that will have us really scared or maybe even crying. Is that the same thing?
I found this to be very funny that our significant other could have power over us.
Hi Kerny,
Yes! Women have this power, the look. It is a real thing! It sounds like you have experienced it from your mother… beware the look a girlfriend or wife can give you… I cringe sometimes when I think about it.
TD